ShItTy WeEk
It has been sooo long that i last wrote a blog. It had been 3 years!!! OMG... Didn't expect that my 1st blog after so long was something sooo shitty. Perhaps I just need to vent out the frustration that has been piling up and to the extent that I just couldn't take it.I am almost on fire everyday this week and today was the worst of all. Usually, I do not check on the appraisal grades as it is kind of a standard. However, I don't know why that I checked today and realized that one of the competencies (decision-making) was graded below expectations. When I saw this, I was super angry. What the heck was that? I do not deserved to be graded below expectations so I went to talk to my manager and asked him about it. Guess what. He really stunned me with his answers. The 1st qns he asked was that whether do i check with others on the grading? What?!? Why should I know about others and I am talking about mine. And guess his reply. He replied that majority of us scored below expectations. So what does that means? That i have to accept it when majority of us scored below expectations. Wow, I am super super shocked...If I am already so mad with it, i really cannot imagine about my teammates.
He told me that the competencies grading does not affect my overall performance grading and below expectations doesn't meant that i am bad. Then what the hell you graded me below expectations then. He even told me that the grading he did last year was overrate. What?!? What the shit is he talking about? He said that he wanted us to be proactive in giving recommendations and decision making but how are we going to do it when the management itself is not firm too. I may not be the best but i do not deserve a below expectation for that.
Finally, he just told me nothing can be change and to put it bluntly, i just do not meet his expectations. At the moment, my anger was gone. What comes after that is utterly disappointed, utterly hopeless and simply useless to talk much because it is just a waste of time to listen to all such of excuses.
It is just not worth to work under him. He simply don't appreciate what the team has done.
Therefore, it is worthless to hear expectations from someone who just not worth your time.
P.S: Have to find my way out of the shit...
posted by mAnDy @ 21:18
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